Todays Lesson is Anthropomorphism

I saw this TV show the other night and it had a guy that was sexually aroused by inanimate objects. He was so aroused by this couch that he spread the cushions apart and continued to have sex with it. Now although I cannot relate to this gentleman I do get aroused with rather odd things. Have you ever taken a bite of a really good peach and had the urge to rub it all over your genitalia? Not saying that I did it... but I did it. Also, I was out walking my Egyptian fecal monkey the other night and I was taken aback by this light post. The lines that were formed in it made it look like the curves of a woman with scoliosis. I mean, the word scoliosis just gets my vaj to bubble. I mean anything that looks emaciated just gets me. I mean I cannot look at a "feed the hungry" commercial without rubbing my large erected "nipple cocks". Now I know this is odd but please don't judge me. And if you do judge me please find me guilty of being incredibly sexy. I often have to ask myself, Hector if your dipstick could reach your Fuzzy Balloonknot do you think they would have a good conversation? And by conversation I mean really filthy sex. To end this blog I will post one of most favorite quotes. "But Bert why don't you ask Cookie Monster to join us for "A" is for Anal Sex"....Ernie